Seeing black women radically love themselves inspires me to do the same. When they are living out loud and in their own authenticity, I am encouraged. That special kind of Black Girl Magic rubs off on me and gives me the boost I need to continue on my own self love and confidence journey.
And the three women that I am introducing to you, have done just that for me. I’ve followed these incredible women for a while and inspired just doesn’t describe how their platform and content makes me feel. So I asked them to share a bit of their journey with you.
Read on for their stories of self love and confidence. And make sure you follow them all on social media for their daily doses of magic.
Ashley Gantt on Self Love and Confidence...
Girl, I love you!
Growing up, I often thought I was not enough or too much, never just right. This was in the face of my mother affirming me in every way possible, every single day. She still does. I had to learn to turn off society’s noise, and I am still learning how to do that. My latest bout with a lack of confidence was about my abilities as an entrepreneur, and it’s been a wild right, y’all. Wild. But, I got here because of love. Self-love. I realized that the only person that will always be with me, is me. I realized that I needed to get to know myself, and that’s when I started to fall in love with all my insecurities.
My journey to loving myself began with deep hurt and feeling lost. I hope that is not the genesis of your love story, but if it is and you’re there now, it’ll get better. Trust me. I woke up one day and I did not recognize myself. I did not know who I became or like that woman. She was a people pleaser, denied her desires, acquiesced to things that made her uncomfortable and shrank when she needed to advocate for herself in meaningful ways. She wanted to be loved by all, which came at the price of her genuinely loving herself.
Where I am now is a place I could not even imagine. I did not imagine it because I simply did not know she was in me. I took a dark time in my life and imagined what life would be like in the ideal circumstances, and I still didn’t land close to how much I love myself now. I got here by recognizing that I was broken, going to therapy, and being open to all the ugly that would be revealed and uncovered. I promised myself to be honest with me no matter what its cost would be. I promised to show myself my authentic self. I vowed to speak lovingly to myself. I swore never to allow myself to be thrown into chaos because I thought another’s love was superior to my own.
I hope this gives you some inspiration to jump over the cliff and fall in love with you. You are the only you that this planet will ever see, so embrace you fiercely, grow constantly, and love so deep that it permeates the air around you.
Love and Peace,
Faith on natural hair love and acceptance…
It started at the age of about 12 or 13 years old with a fellow natural hair friend. She had a beautiful natural loose curl pattern and I said to myself I want my hair to be and look like that. And at that point I took some time to think then decided to go natural.
I began to grow out my permed hair and my natural hair began to shine through. However, this was not my happily ever after. I realized my natural hair was not as loose and flowy as I once saw, and I was quite disappointed. There came a time when I only had about 2 inches of permed hair left and I told my mother I was ready to cut it off. My hair was beautiful, but I did not see it that way.
As I got older I grew more confused and frustrated with my natural hair as it was not what I wanted or expected and was difficult to manage, and needless to say I was not in love. I wanted to find ways to loosen my curl pattern or wear it in protective styles constantly to hide it.
It wasn’t until about high school I got into learning about MY natural hair and what did and didn’t work, that I became less frustrated with managing my natural hair. I still can’t say I was quite in love.
It wasn’t until the last few years where, I knew what products worked, figured out what styles looked best, and embarked on sharing my natural hair journey with others that I can say I fell in love with my natural hair. Through sharing my journey with others and sharing my inspiration and hairstyles, I learned that my natural hair was beautiful, bold, courageous, acceptable, and healthy. This is when I knew I fell in love with my natural hair…
I hope that every Curlfriend finds a time in their journey where they can reflect and find true love in embracing their natural hair!
Your Fellow Curlfriend,
Vicky on self love and confidence…
Confidence is something that you don’t grow up having. So many things impact your ability to feel confident from experiencing rejection, hurtful words, negative self-talk, and the list goes on. My story is filled with a moment where having confidence was a struggle for me.
Growing up, I never felt pretty enough, smart enough, or had the perfect body. I felt invisible for most of my life and thought that I didn’t matter to anyone.
I would look for validation from my friends, family, and teachers on who I was supposed to be. I couldn’t make a move in my life without second-guessing if I were making the right move. These things were signs that I had a major confidence issue that I needed to overcome.
Overcoming issues you are having with your confidence isn’t easy. You have to do the work to undo all the things that have killed your confidence. What that journey looked like for me was changing how I saw myself. I had to begin to see that I was a child of God created in his image. Nothing God makes is junk, and because of that, I can show up in this world confidently.
Once I made that shift in how I saw myself, everything changed. I begin to show up as the version of Vicky that I was created to be. There are still times when my confidence wavers, but the difference now is that I have the tools to fight the wavering moments.
Showing up in this world confidently has nothing to do with how you look or your style; it has everything to do with how you see yourself from the inside out. Resolve what’s going on the inside and watch your confidence go through the roof.
It’s not too late to begin the journey of loving all of you. Know that you are a masterpiece, uniquely created, absolutely beautiful and walk in that confidence!
With Love and Confidence,